Indecisive Wedding Planners. The Worst.

Last weekend we went to a friend's wedding that was for lack of better words, phenomenal.  Absolute perfection.  It couldn’t have gone any better.  When we got back, people kept asking me, “so did you get a lot of ideas?!”  Ideas?  Heck no!  If anything I now have a whole other slew of items now on my brain that I hadn’t even thought about before!  And since my brain HAS to weigh every single idea on both sides of the scale, I am not making much progress.

Libras should not be allowed to plan a wedding.  Seriously, I am so up and down, in and out, unsure of what I really want to get into and am driving my fiance up the freaking wall.  I feel really bad, but I cannot stop my indecisive nature.  It’s been ingrained in me my whole life.  

One minute I want a traditional church ceremony followed by a reception, and the next I am gung ho about privately going the courthouse.  I’m not even sure what things are the most important to me.  Do I really want a dress?  Do I care if a priest marries us?  You’d think I’d at least know something at this point.  Especially being that girl who’s wanted to be married for the past ten years now.  

Yet I still find myself going back and forth on every single thing that I can possibly debate.  And at the end of the day, I’m unsure if I even want a wedding.  (Note: I said wedding. Not marriage! The marriage I am sure of!)  

The first thing that causes me to second guess every pang of excitement is probably a normal one: the budget.  Ours is basically zero.  We have no savings and nobody particularly donating to the cause, so it really comes down to what is possible in a years time and how much debt we are willing to accumulate.  There are two schools of thought going through my head.  One says this is possibly the most memorable day of my life and it will only happen once, so make it special.  The other says, it’s only a day!  It’s the marriage, the lifetime we will experience together, that I am most excited about and the wedding day itself will be over in a flash regardless of what is going on. Flip, flop... what to do?

Next, bridal party or no?  I honestly never thought I’d have one, mainly because I don’t want to torture anybody and just want them to be able to enjoy the event on their own terms.  But somewhere inside I’m second guessing myself.  Am I going to regret not having bridesmaids?  Would I be missing out on some grand experience of getting ready with a bunch of other girls and sipping mimosas in matching loungewear?  Will I say to myself “man, I really wish I had a picture of my dress on the hanger and my shoes on the floor”?  It seems so silly, but I just don’t know. Flip, flop, flip, flop.... here we go again.

Last, I have age phobia.  I sometimes feel like I’m too old to be having a big wedding.  I even question if I should really be wearing a white dress.  Certainly this plays into the bridal party questions of should grown women outside of high school spirit days be caught dead in matching outfits?  I know that these thoughts are irrational. I logically know this, but I can’t stop thinking it.  Flip, flop.... my brain may just explode.  

So, I need to know from former brides, did you have a big wedding or a small one?  If you did it again, what would you change?  Did you wake up the next day with buyers remorse?  Or were you basking in the best day of your life and know that it was worth every penny? 

post signature


  1. I loved reading this because it brought back memories of my wedding and all the emotions with it. Now that there is pinterest I dont know how you brides can decide on anything!! ha. So we paid for our own wedding and literally saved for a year and a few months to do so. We put aside money each month towards our wedding fund. I learned to put money towards things that were most important like photography and cake. Yes i know, cake?! But I love cake and wanted a great tasting and great looking cake. You can do fake outs on the cake tiers by only having a real top and bottom tier and the middle tiers are just frosted foam or whatever they use. Save money there for sure! I loved our wedding. I was just as indecisive as you and so the best advice I can give is to start looking at prices for everything..venues, food, decor, flowers. Get an idea of what it all costs and what you would be willing to spend. Then take baby steps towards doing it vs looking at everything at once and how will you accomplish it! My bridesmaids were in Target dresses and maybe payless heals. They all looked cute, could wear the spring dress again and were out maybe $40-50. It was soo wonderful to see all of our family and friends for a few days, including the wedding day because how often does that happen. I feel like i am rambling but there is just soo much to tell!! ha ha. Sorry.

  2. Also meant to tell you..take your time. While you are making up your mind start saving. Collect ideas, look at stuff and it will all fall into place. And don't forget to make it all about YOU TWO! So many folks will have opinions and tell you what you should do or what you would like but just stay true to your wants and what makes you and the groom happy and it will be perfect!! Remember you can't please everyone and this day is all its the court house or a grand event! :)

    1. Thank you so much for the great advice! I love that you got the dresses from Target. Totally something I would do! I know that everything will end up perfect and whatever is meant to be will be!

  3. I love your blog post so much I swear I felt like I was reading my own thoughts doubts excitement and fear! I am in the same position and wanting the same answers if people could do it again would they do it all over again the big wedding the possibility of debt the stress of it all of would they just elope or go down to the courts ! If you ever find the answer please let me know! In the mean time all the best! I hope whatever wedding you have it's something you love and enjoy !

  4. This blog is very informative and I would like to see some more blogs on this topic.
    Plan Your Wedding With Ease With 7vachan

  5. No.1 Astrologer in India Pt. Ravikant Shastri Ji 8 Time Gold Medallist Vashikaran specialist Love problem , Marriage problem , Family problem and all problem solution. 1001 % Guarantee.

    Website :-

  6. Astrologer RK Swami Ji Vashikaran specialist , Love problem , Marriage problem , Lottery number specialist , Black magic specialist and all problem solution.

    Website :-

  7. This comment has been removed by the author.

  8. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  9. This comment has been removed by the author.

  10. Thank you for such an informative blog, hope to see some more in future..
    Bina Punjani, best bridal makeup artist in Goa